Monday, December 31, 2012

Choosing A Web Payday Loans Service


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Sunday, October 7, 2012

Strokes - An Acquired Brain Injury


In order to optimize stroke recovery, it is paramount to have early diagnosis and appropriate and immediate medical care. To do this, recognizing the symptoms of a stroke are important so that immediate action can be taken. They are: numbness or weakness of the face, arm or leg, especially on one side of the body; sudden confusion, trouble speaking or understanding; trouble seeing out of either one or both eyes; difficulty walking, dizziness or loss of balance, or a sudden, severe headache.
If a stroke is suspected you must immediately call 911 or an emergency response system in your area. There is a very limited window from the onset of symptoms to when therapy can successfully be used. To determine whether it is a stroke or not, have the person smile. Their face should move symmetrically. Also ask them to raise both arms so that any evidence of paralysis will be evident, and to speak a simple sentence. While waiting for the ambulance to arrive, the person should lie flat to allow the blood to flow to the brain. If there are definite stroke symptoms, do not give them aspirin in case there is any bleeding.
Once a stroke patient has become medically stable, rehabilitation can begin which will initially teach him/her how to manage their own personal hygiene, feed themselves, get in and out of bed and to be able to use the bathroom on their own.
Further rehabilitation may include a physical therapist, occupational therapist, speech and language pathologist, psychologist and recreation therapist depending on the severity of the stroke. This type of rehabilitation will help to promote independence in their daily lives. Responses to treatment, and their overall recovery will, however, depend mainly upon themselves and their own personalities. Part of early recovery is spontaneous which are natural abilities that will automatically begin to come back, especially during the first few weeks. But significant recovery can be made even years following a stroke. Rehabilitation works best when stroke survivors and their families work together.
After rehabilitation in either a formal program or as individual services, the person will eventually be able to return to community living. During this stage they may have to learn to do common tasks in a different way. It may be that they will have to use their opposite hand to write or do things they originally did with their other hand. They may require velcroe on their shoes instead of laces or if it had been a serious stroke, they may require the use of a wheelchair.
Strokes can affect the body, mind and feelings. And because a stroke is an acquired brain injury, they may have many of the same deficits that those who have suffered a traumatic brain injury have been faced with. They may be unaware of their injury, have problems with their memory, experience lack of judgment and motivation as well as other cognitive problems, and fatigue and depression.
The most important thing in having a successful outcome following a stroke is that there is an early diagnosis, with immediate therapy and treatment. Without early treatment, there is the risk of life-long consequences to the patient such as disabilities that could possibly have been prevented.

Friday, September 21, 2012

What Is Love Addiction?


"Addicted to Love" is more than just the title of a Robert Palmer song; it is a form of sex addiction and can be as destructive as any other sexual behavior taken to an extreme.
Also called seductive addiction, this is a case where the addict is compelled to seduce another or frequently enter into new relationships. While in other types of sex addiction the person is after the feelings and brain chemicals produced by physical sex acts, here the goal is the heady feeling one gets in the first stages of a romantic relationship.
Most humans can appreciate, in one form or another, the feeling when one is first falling in love. Their thoughts revolve around the other person, their behavior changes, and they see the object of their interest, and perhaps the world in general, in a better light. The condition has been portrayed in all forms of media going back as far as those media have existed. Books are written, movies are made, songs are written, blogs are created, articles are written, poems created, and so much more to honor the feeling of falling in love. It's a powerful feeling, and one around which a person can develop an addiction.
In a healthy relationship, those intense emotions work to form deep bonds and fade over time into something different and more sustainable. An analogy often used compares the first stages of a romance to a roaring fire whose flames, over time, burn down to glowing coals. Many sex and relationship advice experts talk about "rekindling romance" and "finding that old spark."
After all that, the sex addict will build a new fire, and another, and another, and another. Their brain is seeking that love-at-first-sight feeling, that thrill of wooing another into a relationship. When that feeling dies down, they move on to do it again.
Of course it's not unusual and is, in fact, the norm for a person to have had a few relationships like this before settling on one that is more long term. Once the "honeymoon is over" so to speak, two people may learn they are not matched well enough to carry on a long-term relationship and will break it off one way or another. Most experts would hesitate to put a firm number on the number of relationships that constitutes normal. Sex addiction cannot be readily identified using any kind of numerical criteria or formula. The frequency and intensity of the relationships are all factors to be considered in diagnosing this addiction.
The negative consequences of such a sex addiction can be a string of jilted lovers, stress from being in a constant state of emotional chaos, and, if the love addiction ritual involves copulation, possibly even sexually transmitted diseases or pregnancies. Because of our cultural norms and mores, females with love addiction can open themselves to stigma, being labeled "whores" or "sluts" by others, or can feel that way about themselves.
Men may find this behavior encouraging, being labeled a "ladies' man" or a "player." They may never seek treatment for it, not seeing it as a problem.
For women this is one of the most common forms of sex addiction. Women tend to be more subtle about their seduction methods but will go through lovers as fast as men with a sexual addicted.
The media, to some degree, can contribute to this distorted sense of relationship. Stories tend to focus on that initial romantic fire, while significantly fewer songs are sung and fewer movies are made about a mature relationship with many years behind it and more to go. Perhaps more than a few love addicts started developing their sex addiction merely by being poorly educated on what a good relationship entails, thinking that intensity at the start is not supposed to fade. Most people learn differently, and it's not a given that a sex addict or love addict is unaware of how a relationship should be. A sex addict may even form a long term relationship and sabotage it with affairs as they seek romance on the side.
A sex addict with a truly distorted view of a healthy relationship may see love and romance as simply the art of seduction and sexual encounters. To them, romantic partners are not people to form connections with, but targets or prey to be won over, wooed, seduced, and conquered. The relationship ends with the act of sex, and when they finally decide to go for a "real" relationship, the sex addict can find maintaining one difficult

Friday, September 7, 2012

What Is Hypnotherapy? (What Isn't Hypnotherapy)


A great number of people have misconceptions about what hypnotherapy is, what it isn't, what it can achieve, and what it can't. So what is it? And, can it really help?
Lets start by dispelling the first myth of hypnotherapy - It is not about the stage shows. This is theatre, a hypnotherapist simply cannot make you squawk like a chicken or generally act like an idiot without your agreement. Lets have a look at stage hypnotherapy for a moment and how it works
Well, if you imagine that in the audience for a stage hypnosis show and there's 1000 people there, and say 90% of them actually want to be there and are up for a show, so that's 900 left in the pot of potential candidates. Before the show the hypnotherapist will ask who is willing to come up on stage and make a fool out of themselves. Say for instance that 50% of them agree, so we're left with 450. The hypnotist will then go through a series of susceptibility tests to see who will make the best volunteers and will select, say 50. Then those people will go through another series of hypnotic tests to see who really is "up for it" to determine the most susceptible, outgoing characters in the group. The rest will be sent back to the audience, and those on stage will be "primed" ready for the show. So a stage hypnotist will load the tables before the group even start acting like chickens or whatever they are asked to do. About 60 years ago governments experimented with hypnosis as a means of interrogation for captured enemy soldiers. After many studies they discovered that enemy soldiers could not be hypnotised to give up secrets! What this proved was that the person being hypnotised is still always in control at some level and cannot be made to do something that goes against their core beliefs. So now you know, you cannot be made to squawk like a chicken, without your agreement, what can be done with hypnotherapy?
Now this is the exciting part, and get ready for a long winded answer... Anything you can imagine!
That said, there are physical limitations. For instance if you're wheelchair bound and you ask a hypnotherapist "Can hypnosis help me win the 100 metres mens final at the Olympic Games?", you're going to have to expect a "No"! But, if you ask a hypnotherapist "I've had this phobia of heights for 20 years, but I really, really want to climb a mountain, can you help?". In that case the answer is a resounding "YES". If you have a problem and you want a solution then hypnotherapy can help you massively!
How does hypnotherapy work as a therapy? Use an hypnotic induction to get you into a state of deep relaxation, very similar to a state of deep meditation. Once there the conscious mind is pretty much switched into a standby mode (just like your TV) and the unconscious mind is ready to listen deeply and openly to suggestions. A series of hypnotherapy techniques (like embedded commands, illusionary choice, and metaphors) can then be to speak directly to your unconscious mind and change the belief programming that has been causing you problems. Now the great thing is here that you are always in control, and your unconscious mind will accept the new programming deeply and allow it to take effect immediately.
Hypnotherapy deals with phobias, fears, unwanted negative emotions, performance coaching, weight loss, stopping smoking, the list goes on and on!

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Stress - Is It Killing You?


We have always know that long-term stress is bad for you - the constant and prolonged release of the stress hormone cortisol is associated with a number of serious effects including high blood pressure, suppressed immunity, decreased bone density, impaired cognitive performance and many others. However, have you noticed the amount of recent research on exactly how bad it is for you there has been lately?
A recent study for the Lancet by Prof Andrew Steptoe indicates work related stress causes a 23% increase in the risk of heart attacks
Researchers in the US have now analysed the brain tissue from depressed & stressed individuals and discovered a brain shrinkage. It is believed the stress blocks the formation of new nerve connections disrupting the circuits associated with mental and emotional function, how stress and depression shrink the brain.
More recently, Professor Sarah Berga of Emory University of Atlanta has released her research on the link between stress and infertility.
SO - WHAT CAN YOU DO?
You have got to work. You can't give your teenagers away (nice thought maybe) and the house/garden etc is not going to do itself. (Roll on the invention of the self-cleaning house we say!)
It is all about finding something you can do, for yourself, to reduce your personal stress levels and increase your levels of relaxation. What you do is going to be down to personal choice, but you have to find it, schedule it in and commit to it. After all, how hard would it really be to schedule in a 20min walk in the park? ANSWER - Not very hard, unless your stress levels are already becoming chronic and impacting on your mental well-being - then what? We would always recommend you visit your GP to get a correct diagnosis and then, any good GP will recommend a talking/counselling therapy. Again, who you choose for your therapy should be your decision; you really need to feel you could trust and feel comfortable with your therapist to get the best results.
We believe prolonged and/or chronic stress is a silent killer of our age. Do not ignore it. Have a look at some of the symptoms listed below:
  • Difficulty with sleeping
  • Palpitations
  • Constant tiredness
  • Aching/tense muscles
  • Deminished Libido
  • Weight gain or loss (not due to dieting)
  • Increased alcohol or drug intake
Do more than one of these apply to you?
Yes? GET SOME HELP
We always provide a free consultation either in person or by telephone before we would even allow a client to make an appointment for our hypnotherapy or NLP

Thursday, July 12, 2012

How to Cure a Mental Illness Based on The Meaning of Dreams


Carl Jung's method of dream interpretation is curing mental illnesses since 1920. I started curing people from various mental illnesses through dream therapy by using his method of dream interpretation in September of 1990. I continued his difficult and complicated research by obeying the guidance of the unconscious mind in dream messages.
The fact that I managed to simplify Carl Jung's complicated method of dream interpretation is a great advantage for you. My dynamic simplifications help you immediately understand what you have to do in order to stop having psychological problems.
You can be sure that the scientific method of dream interpretation is a safe psychotherapeutical method because it is not based on human ignorance. When you trust the scientific method of dream interpretation you are trusting a psychotherapeutical method successfully tested during two generations, which is based on divine wisdom, and not on human suppositions.
All ancient civilizations that respected the importance of the meaning of dreams were right. Some civilizations could understand the unconscious language, even though they didn't transmit their knowledge to the world.
The advantage to receive precious messages in dreams is an alternative we didn't expect we could have. The meaning of dreams is underestimated by most people in our world. Nobody can believe that the meaning of dreams must be respected because it surpasses our expectations.
On the other hand, the hypocritical mindset of the absurd modern civilization is materialistic and atheistic. Our barbarous civilization disregards many truths.
Everyone must translate the meaning of dreams based on the scientific method of dream interpretation, so that they may recognize the superiority of the unconscious guidance.
The perfect treatment of the unconscious mind is visible from the beginning. All mental illnesses are cured based on wisdom.
For example, I will show you a simple phrase from a dreamer's dream and my translations:
'I'm at a bus stop. I see a machine that lets you play bass guitar.'
Dream Translation:
'I'm at a bus stop.'
You represent your ego in dreams.
The bus is a vehicle. Therefore, it represents your life.
If you'll take a bus in a dream this means that your life will follow the repetitive route that everyone follows, which ends up on frustrations and deceptions. The bus doesn't give you new alternatives and solutions. The bus follows always the same route.
You are at the bus stop because your ego had the intention to follow a route without alternatives.
'I see a machine that let's you play bass guitar.'
The machine with games represents an illusion.
The fact that you can play bass guitar means that this illusion will give you joy.
In a few words:
If you'll repeat the mistakes of the human race and follow the same route that everyone follows, you will end up on frustrations.
If you'll believe in illusions, you will end up on frustrations.
You have to look for new alternatives in life and evolve.
You also have to be serious and pay attention to the real facts of your reality, instead of believing in unreal things.
...
The unconscious words in dreams work like psychotherapy and at the same time, they have a philosophical background. They help the dreamer think like a philosopher.
The sentence: 'If you'll repeat the mistakes of the human race'... shows to the dreamer that his life belongs to a certain behavioral system created in ancient times. He must pay attention to the details of this system and avoid repeating the mistakes of previous generations.
The dreamer understands that he tends to repeat the mistakes of the human race because he belongs to this behavioral system. Therefore, he must pay attention to the signs that indicate that he is repeating common human mistakes.
The dreamer must find new alternatives in life instead of repeating his ancestors' mistakes. He has the chance to evolve if he will follow the unconscious guidance in dreams.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

The Impact Of Sleep Deprivation On Health


How much sleep are you getting?

Numerous studies carried out by experts show the importance of sleep and the negative results that occur when it's lacking. Experts on sleep show that that REM sleep, or dream-sleep, helps consolidate "fragile" memories the brain creates throughout the day so that they can be easily organized and stored in the brain's long-term memory. Can you imagine not being able to remember important events that goes on in your life? This is one of the main problems linked to lack of sleep and why it's so important to get enough of it.
Almost everyone is aware of the need for enough hours of sleep but do most of us really know what's the required number of hours for the average human? 8 hours of every day is the ideal number for optimal functioning of the human body. Most of us have a biological clock that lets us know exactly how many hours of sleep our body needs on average. However, sleeping disorders can distort this sleep cycle and seeking help from an expert is the best option. Age is an important factor in determining how many hours of sleep we need.
  • A normal adult requires about 7-8 hours of sleep but this number may vary depending on other factors such as mental health.
  • A baby needs up to 16 hours of sleep
  • 9 hours of sleep is just about right for teenagers
  • Pregnant women need to sleep longer than your average adult.
What is Sleep Deprivation?
Sleep deprivation is a condition in which a person does not get enough hours of sleep and it can be either acute or chronic.
Impact on your Health
Studies have shown that sleep deprivation impacts negatively on brain activity and cognitive functions. Since the brain controls what's going on inside our bodies, this has an adverse effect on our health and fitness. According to researchers, depriving oneself of this vital biological function may result in:
  • Memory problems
  • Aching muscles
  • Impaired judgement and fatigue; many traffic accidents and deaths are caused by drivers falling asleep behind the wheel.
  • Weight Loss/gain
  • Depression
  • Hallucinations
  • Obesity
  • Increased risk of diabetes
  • Adversely affects growth & the healing process
How can I get enough sleep?
Sleep deprivation results in a sleep deficit. Our bodies need to repay this deficit since we can't seem to adapt to it. Common symptoms are fatigue, daytime sleepiness,clumsiness and weight loss or weight gain. The only safe way to combat sleep deprivation is to ensure that you get enough sleep time at night. stimulants like caffeine can be effective to counteract the effects of sleep deprivation but it becomes less effective if used frequently.

Monday, May 14, 2012

What to Expect From Individual Psychotherapy (One-On-One Counseling)


The choice to seek out psychotherapy or counseling frequently begins with desiring to function better in everyday life. Attending therapy is not a means to obtain guidance from a professional on your problems, rather it is a way to figure out how to proactively recognize new methods and to make choices in a fashion that creates constructive momentum with regards to accomplishment of your life goals.
What is psychotherapy?
Individual psychotherapy entails getting together with a therapist by means of one-on-one counseling. Therapy is a process of evaluating your thoughts, emotions, physical feelings and relationship habits as a way to obtain greater self-awareness and empathy for yourself and others, as well as to reveal the ways you may unconsciously deny yourself the full potential to live your life healthy and complete. In individual psychotherapy this could mean figuring out how to tune in to yourself and other people in new ways, developing an understanding of how you observe the world and your relationships, fortifying your strength for dealing with life's challenges and accepting personal responsibility for your experiences in an effort to decrease your participation in your own struggling.
What should you expect at your first visit to Psychotherapy?
When you show up for your preliminary consultation visit you should be requested to read and complete paperwork related to familiarizing yourself with client rights and responsibilities, confidentiality, requesting medical health insurance billing information and acknowledging your comprehension of the payment policy. You'll be able to request coordination of services with any other appropriate health professional whose treatment you receive, including psychiatrists and medical doctors.
Next you should sit down with your therapist to supply a history of the issues that have brought you to therapy, and be provided the chance to ask any questions you may have regarding the therapy process. Your therapist will help you to outline typical categories for your treatment objectives and commence to establish possible tangible measures of your improvement towards those objectives. Your therapist will match all of your objective areas to appropriate skill sets and together you should layout a treatment strategy which will begin your progress towards achieving those goals. Finally, you'll talk over and agree upon a schedule and frequency for going to therapy. That frequency will depend on a number of factors, including the severity or urgency of the issues that encouraged you to seek therapy, your perception of your commitment to keeping up with therapeutic work in between appointments and financial restrictions or health insurance coverage limitations.
What should you expect from ongoing Psychotherapy visits?
In the course of therapy, your therapist will rely upon a variety of strategies to influence change in the trend of the treatment solution goals you've selected. Continuing therapy occurs in an organized and structured format. At the start of every session you will assess your progress in the direction of your goals, including a conversation regarding the results of any homework exercises. You may go over any new current issues. At the conclusion of each session you will concur on a recommendation for homework to be accomplished by your next session. The framework of this format is designed to preserve a concentration on resolving issues, as opposed to just discussing them. Additionally, your therapist will continually plan for and talk about cancellation of therapy. This planning is designed not just to assist you to understand when you will be prepared to finish therapy but also to offer you numerous opportunities to investigate how you feel about leaving therapy well in advance of that departure.
Summary
By dealing with problematic behaviors, negative core beliefs, unexpressed or challenging emotions, unresolved turmoil, along with your emotional and physical reactions to all of these areas, therapy can assist you in achieving positive mental health and emotional well-being. These strategies can be used to treat a wide variety of different issues including stress, couples counseling, PTSD, depression, relationship issues, anxiety, grief, addiction, sexuality issues, OCD and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD).

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

5 Biggest Problems Individuals Face With Sex Addiction


Sex addiction can be a devastating disease to deal with because it affects every aspect of a person's life. The repercussions of sex addiction disrupt the addict's social, emotional, physical, legal and financial life.
1. How Sex Addiction Affects an Individual Socially 
Sex addiction isolates the addict from everyone around him since the addiction becomes the primary focus of life, creating a great many social problems as a result. Naturally, if the person was in a social relationship, that relationship will be in turmoil. Feelings of isolation, abandonment, inadequacy, guilt, embarrassment and anger all will be present at one point or another throughout the addiction and recovery process. Other relationships will suffer as well, including those with family, friends and co-workers. The addict will have isolated himself from everyone, the focus on the sexually compulsive and obsessive behaviors escalates and the individual isolates and goes deeper in the relationship with the behaviors. Changing that pattern of habits takes time and it will also take a great deal of effort and time to help restore those neglected and sometimes broken relationships. Nonetheless, a social life is very important for any healthy human being and the addict will need a strong social support system to help in his recovery.

2. How Sex Addiction Affects an Individual Emotionally
Sex addicts have a wide range of troubling emotions. Anxiety, anger, frustration, stress, shame, guilt and fear of discovery are all common emotions for addicts to experience throughout the entire process, from addiction to recovery.
In order to have successful recovery, the addict will need to be able to address their emotional problems effectively. Shame and guilt are among the most prevalent emotions with sex addicts because they are struggling with an addiction which contradicts their moral and spiritual beliefs. As much as they want to be "normal" their true beliefs say otherwise, this causes such strong shame and guilt and keeps the addict in the spiral of addiction.
In addition, boredom, fatigue and despair can envelop in the addict enduring a prolonged struggle with their addiction. In extreme cases, these emotional struggles can lead to suicide.
3. How Sex Addiction Affects an Individual Physically
The addict engaging in risky sexual behavior can expose himself to any number of physical problems related to sexually transmitted infections and diseases. Genital injury, cervical cancer, HIV/AIDS, herpes, genital warts and other STDs are common among sex addicts. In some cases, the addict's desires may even put them in harm's way, resulting in physical injury or even death. Many of these individuals spend so much time in their unwanted sexual behaviors, they lose sleep, don't exercise or eat properly. This in itself, takes a great toll on the body.
When an addict puts themselves in risky sexual situations, their ability to put the brakes on disappears. They become so intent on getting their fix they'll go places they never thought they'd go, sleep with people then never dreamed they would and take risks that carry with them extreme danger. Often times the lust for the sex escalates to a point where the rush and high of the experience become so intense and then after the danger, the addict crashes hard and at times has been physically abused or hurt.
4. How Sex Addiction Affects an Individual Legally
This addiction can result in people breaking the law. Addicts often engage in sexual harassment, obscene phone calls, exhibitionism, voyeurism, prostitution, rape, incest and child molestation.. It has become more and more prevalent with the onset of chat rooms, instant messaging and social media for sex addicts to prey on members of the opposite sex, same sex and often times underage children. As the disease progresses, some addicts break the law and have a need to engage in illegal activities. As the need to act out sexually escalates, addicts commit crimes they wouldn't ordinarily consider. The results can have serious legal consequences.
5. How Sex Addiction Affects an Individual Financially
People who struggle with sex addiction often put their lives on hold. They'll show up late to work, call out sick from work, neglect responsibilities, miss deadlines and act irrationally while on the job. They become so exhausted from living the life of sexually acting out, they have trouble focusing on anything else and often times go through life in a zombie like state.
This behavior can often lead to job loss. To make matters worse, many addicts will spend a great deal of money on pornography, adult phone services, prostitutes and other costly sexual activities. The combination of job loss and excessive spending to fuel a sex addiction can lead to serious financial problems. Not only can the financial loss be measured I dollars spent on the addiction, one must take into consideration the hours spent acting out sexually and for many, the opportunity cost of what could have been accomplished while they were acting out.
As you can see, someone suffering from this compulsion will have a great many problems to overcome aside from just the addiction itself. The number and scale of the problems facing an addict can be overwhelming and the need for a strong support system is essential during and after the recovery process.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Detaching From the Grip of "Despair-Ation": Keeping Your Hopes High When Your Funds Run Low


The roofs over our heads, the clothing on our bodies. Communication, transportation. Con Ed, grocery to keep ourselves fed. Some costs are here to stay. Resources to cover these expenses? Here today, but maybe not for the rest of the day. In this stormy economic climate, jobs are as ephemeral as Arctic summers, as fragile as twigs in tornadic winds. One budget cut, one departmental change, and out of the blue comes a pink slip. Your income comes no more. Your sense of security disappears faster than the cents in your bank account.
When I wrote the first draft of this article, my tears were dripping onto a park bench in New York City. Twenty-one hours had ticked by since my sudden termination from my "survival" job. (Modeling and writing sometimes leave bills uncovered. I don on part-time hats such as "hostess" or "assistant" to make ends meet.) When I still occupied space at my now former workplace, fiscal frets were already frying my brain. How am I going to afford my Metro Card, especially with this looming fare hike? Ugh, I am tired of falling asleep to the lullaby of my growling stomach! Groan, groan, groan, gotta pay that student loan. Now my "steady" source of income takes a hike? "Mood" spelled backwards spells doom; doom is the best I can hope for.
This morbid state of mind likely strikes familiar chords in you, or in someone you know. Even if you inhabit the underbelly of a rock, you've probably heard of people cutting back on spending because of the economy. Budgeting isn't always an accurate term for this, because many people barely have a budget to live on. Especially if medical and/or family emergencies wiped out what little the recession left. Anyone in such a situation can vouch for the damage it does to one's physical and psychological livelihood.
Yet many of them won't utter a word.
Emotional distress often surrounds the mere thought of revealing severe financial problems. There's the fear of vulnerability. "Will people manipulate me, or take advantage of me, because I have no money?" Or the fear that there's no point in saying anything, or the consequences of doing so. "Can anyone really grasp how broke I am? Can anyone help? Whatever the case, if I say anything, I'll just sound like Prince(ss) Self-Pity." Many people privately plummet into despair, and some view suicide as the only solution.
For anyone contemplating suicide, please break any silence and seek help. Research the internet and ask friends (remember, you're not alone in feeling this way) for recommendations for low-cost and free mental health counseling. I am no substitute for a licensed counselor. But perhaps I can help by sharing why we ought to give up hopelessness before we give up hope.
In our states of despair, we develop a distorted self-image in which we do not consider our full potential. We depict ourselves as weaklings rather than the warriors we really are. We ruminate on any shortsightedness that lead to our financial downfalls. We brainwash ourselves with shame and resentment after our attempts to remedy our situations fail. Does any of this ring a bell? "That prospective client or employer turned me down. If only they had given me a chance, I would have avoided yet another overdue bill notice. If only I were smarter, or better looking. If only I were born into a different family/mind/body... "
Scrutinizing our weaknesses (some of which neither exist nor matter), we overlook our internal assets and our prior successes. We all have achievements on our track records. Furthermore, we have all reached goals under unfavorable circumstances. Did you land a position for which you were supposedly under qualified? Maybe your abilities to learn quickly and connect the dots compensated for any lack of experience. Maybe your determination helped you graduate magna cum laude, in spite of learning disabilities. Naysayers probably nagged you with, "Are you out of your mind?" and "Let's be realistic, you can't do that." But you proved them wrong, didn't you?
You can sometimes escape the noise of the external critics. Limiting time spent with them, working wonders with earplugs and duct tape--just kidding on those last two. Muting the internal critic (let's call it "I.C." for fun brevity) is understandably harder, because I.C. follows us everywhere. What if I.C. torments you with constant "you can't do this" or "you're doomed that"? How can you get I.C. to (insert expletives of choice here) off?
Reverse your focus. "Mission impossible" has a funny way of becoming "Mission Accomplished" when we trade self-doubt for determination. Ironically, my lack of education taught me this lesson. I was home-schooled from third through eighth grade. Among the many disadvantages this gave me was an academic one. My curriculum was sub par at best. I barely exaggerate when I say I skipped six years of school. When I enrolled in a traditional school in ninth grade, the academic deficiencies became painfully obvious. Just as you must learn addition before multiplication, you must learn pre-algebra before algebra. I hadn't even learned the precedents of pre-algebra, so how could I understand algebra? Or any subject for that matter? I didn't even know how to effectively take notes or study! These conditions sound favorable for failure, don't they?
Sure enough, my tests came back bleeding in blood-red ink. Several of my peers snickered at the "F" bombs dropped on my paper (not the four-letter word kind, but the grade kind that makes you lock yourself in your room and shout F bombs). Progress reports, or rather lack of progress reports, made frequent cameos in my mailbox. First we had those unfavorable circumstances, now we have evidence that I am not going to overcome them.
Deep down inside, I disagreed with the evidence: success was the inevitable, while failure wasn't even an option. My only choice was upping my average from "D/F" to "A/B". So what if it required spending hours after school with tutors? Spending half of my weekend waking hours studying? Whatever I must do. I'll admit, this was no easy feat. I often felt overwhelmed and frustrated to the point of tears. But I found it in me to push through, and it all paid off. I finished ninth grade with an "A/B" average, and I graduated from high school as a National Honor Society member.
"Unrealistic" achievements can become our reality when we challenge the realms of limitations. We have more power than the circumstances that supposedly hold us back. Yet we allow self-doubt and the confines of "realistic" to imprison our strengths. Let us break free into the freedom of confidence and determination, where our "grim realities" become sitting ducks.
In regards to reality, allow ignorance to be your comforting bliss. Like an iceberg, much of reality remains a mystery. Sure, you see that termination notice in front of you. Yes, your bank balance equals your monthly allowance from fifth grade. But this is only one side of the story. What about the sides you have yet to see? Like the potential solutions?
Economic boom or bust, life bursts with surprises. Maybe on some idle day that began with "y", a friend called you with last minute tickets to see your favorite band. Opportunities have also mastered this pleasant kind of ambush. The day after I lost my hostess position, I brushed my tears aside to smile for the camera at a casting. I wound up booking the job! That script you repeatedly wrote, rewrote, and revised? It could be two days away from the hands of a prestigious and interested producer. Two hours (or two minutes!) from now, a potential employer may contact you with the job offer of a lifetime. Doors to opportunities lie within the walls in which we feel we are trapped. We never know when they will open.
How about another comforting twist on uncertainty? You could be creating new opportunities without realizing it. Behold the power of being yourself; behold the power of putting yourself out there. Indulging your impulses and pursuing your passions may seem leisurely, or even (gasp!) lazy. But rest and recreation often give to birth to great ideas. An article in your favorite sports publication inspires you to contact a new company. Suppose you give yourself a well-deserved break from your job hunt and join friends for an impromptu Sunday get together. Then you meet that "friend of a friend" who introduces you to your next employer. A little fun can boost both your spirits and your funds!
When we feel empowered in the face of our problems, we increase our chances of finding solutions. Hope generates the energy we need to keep sending out those resumes and contacting those clients. Hope enables us to focus on the brighter future that lies beyond any debt-induced deprivation. We will emerge from our financial hardship, wealthier than ever before. Not just in a monetary sense, but in an emotional sense. We will appreciate the basic comforts (food, transportation, clothing) that we might have once taken for granted. We will have acquired strength, wisdom, and confidence. That is the permanent, inevitable outcome of a financial challenge. Destitution is not.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Escape - How To Turn Your Day Around With Less Stress


I'm on surface streets at a red light. I've been driving for almost an hou. I have about another half hour to go. You see, I have an early morning client that I train several times a day. I'm headed back to my neighborhood of Glendale. Personal training is not always fun times. I have tons of driving to do to and from my clients' home. I'm not complaining really as my fee includes that "drive time" stuck in traffic. I also use this time to listen to audio books. As soon as I get to my home base, I have a ritual of sitting in my car quietly for 10-15 minutes and do some deep, diaphragmatic breathing. I sit with my eyes closed and keep a legal pad next to me as I often have ideas I want to write down.
Understand this - There are no instant miracles when it comes to relieving stress. Follow some of the tips suggest below.
10 minutes of quiet...
When you have something on your mind, do a "brain dump" with all your ideas on paper instead of trying to keep it all in your head.
To have a mental break through, sometimes you need t break a sweat...
For stress reduction, I love how exercise improves my mental health.
Exercise daily. When I do, I process ideas so much better. There is a certain energy raised only exercise can give you. Physical activity to good for the mind.
The endorphins make you feel are great.
Go for a walk. Outdoor around your neighborhood. I sometimes go to the local park. Call a friend and step out and make it a fun, going out time of socializing and exercising.
Exercise help increase feel good hormones like endorphins and helps enhance one's feelings of self-esteem. I find physical activity as the best stress relief. It helps me clear my mind.
By training outside you'll feel more refreshed. You have (most of the time) fresh air and you can enjoy nature. This will lower your stress hormone some studies find. Where you are as far as your environment is much better for stress reduction.
Use spousal support does help to keep you consistent.
Research Indiana State University Bloomington study found that married couples were more consistent when they worked out together. It was a study done over a year long. One main reason, one in four women experience sexual energy increase from partnered training with their spouse. Having a spouse and having a healthy sexual relationship helps relieves tension.
Take a yoga class or do vigorous cardio (this can be a fun dance class, too)
Talk to yourself...
Have frustrations? If you feel like you need to swear, then swear. (be aware of who's around you) Find a private space and shout out loud. Don't hold your anger in.
Punch a soft pillow or a punching bag.
Watch something funny like a comedy show on Netflix.
Read a good book or listen to a audio book you're interested in.
Get your headset on...
Listen to good music - I like using noise canceling headset.
Lie down and listen to relaxing or good music. Wear a Bose headset better quality sound.
I hate going to the dentist. I get stressed out when I have an upcoming appointment. I have to do something to calm down. I bring my iPod with me and listen to good music as they are working away (I'm not a fan of drilling sounds)
The local YMCA has a running track on the roof which I use. I stay away from crowds when I use this.
A warm bath in epsom salt helps out too. Even rubbing lotion on my body after a hot shower helps relieve stress.
Talking to a friend over the phone and having a good conversation gets my mind off of things.
Healing methods can help...
Massage therapy has so many benefits. Your body release hormones similar to a Morphine-like effect and you naturally lower your blood pressure and does a whole host of other benefits.
Breathing time...
Practice diaphragmatic breathing. Like I mentioned earlier of what I do when I get to destination after driving for sometime. This can help with stress and anxiety. It's easy to do. Extend the belly muscles or lower part of your tummy muscles and ingesting more air in that part of your lungs. 10 minutes a day could do wonders. Sit for a few minutes while in the car before you going to your next appointment or inside your house after a long day at work.
Avoid these to help you relax...
Say no stimulants. Cut down on alcohol, nicotine and caffeine.
Clear your mind and escape. Increase your energy waves with deep breathing in deep through your belly.
Drink camomile tea in the evening. Doing a few relaxing yoga poses like child and corpse pose or just sitting in a quiet space with your eyes closed before bed.
Cleaning out junk mail (old telephone books, magazines etc.) cabinets (old plastic storage containers), old medicine.
On the computer or your video game console...
Playing video games, drawing or doodling on paper. I might not call it creating artwork but it sure is fun.
Make sure when you play with friends, say, in a basketball game, don't take it seriously and have fun.
The mop can be your friend...
Cook for the family. But avoid using food as your way to release stress.
I house clean. I organize the cabinets, clean the floor, vacuum, wash the dishes.
No waiting is necessary...
Don't wait for machine equipment. What's your back up plan? Do you know how to modify the exercises you do for each body part? Well, you should. This is important for avoiding stress for when waiting for equipment at the gym. Why wait for a particular machine? Do some research and read up on other alternative exercise movement so you can cut through and not waste time when the gym is crowded.
Run for fun with your dog...
Dog walking or running, you choose. Have fun with your pet. Take your dog for a run, jog or brisk walk. Dogs are great for an exercise partner.
You want to ease tension when you exercise, not add to it.
Read a positive or book on tape audio book while excessing
Give yourself 5 minutes. Instead of hitting the showers immediately after your exercise, stop your training earlier and find a quiet place to just be still and quiet for 10 minutes. I suggest finding a place outdoors. Sit back and relax then get cleaned up and dressed.
Find variety of exercise outlets. Bike ride, hiking, roller blading or join a charity run. Sign up for a mud run, 5K, play basketball with your friend.
Plan your snacks...
If you get hungry or you need a snack, have something healthy and ready for you to eat.
Instead of peanuts, try eating soy nuts. Instead of a candy bar, try chocolate fruit dip (banana dipped in chocolate fudge). Instead of pretzels, try air popped popcorn. Instead of ice cream, try fruit shake in a blender. Instead of
You've got plenty of tips here. Choose a few and take action this week. You must take action on what you feel works best for you.